Super Rookie’s World

Sarah and I were lucky enough to get free tickets last night to the Gopher game. Little did we know that we were going to be blessed with having seen Dan Monson’s last game as the horrid coach of the Golden Gopher basketball team! The tickets were located behind a basket opposite of the student section. We also got free passes to the “Arena Club” which has a bunch of free beer and boxed wine. Naturally we took advantage of this and got pretty wasted by game time. I believe it was the high content of alcohol in our system that made the game tolerable to watch.

Never in my life have a seen a group of Big Ten Players that can’t rebound, shoot or have any resemblance to a “team.” I am stoked that Monson is gone and hopefully we can get back on the right track in the Big Ten.

*It should be noted that Monson was a decent coach that was able to lead the program through the aftermath of the Haskin’s Affair to a respectable record. However it was time for him to go because for the past 3 years he has had full scholarship players and failed to do anything of merit.

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Maturi is still a little light below the waist as he needs to get rid of Borton and Mason. It’s a start, but it is a long way from being fixed.

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We picked up Sarah’s new clipless shoes the other night. Pretty soon she will be learning how to clip-in and clip-out. I still remember getting my pedals the first time. It was super strange having your foot secured into the pedal and I fell twice. I still remember the feeling I was having when I fell. One time I just forgot to unclip and before I knew it I was on the ground. Because of that fall I would unclip about a half-a-block away from a stop sign or stop light. Then as I got better I would try to wait longer and longer, so finally one day I was taking a left hand turn at the corner of University and Snelling in St. Paul (perhaps one of the busier intersections in the city) and as I was going real slow waiting for the oncoming traffic I lost my balance and fell right in front of everybody and messed up the light cycle for a bunch of pissed of motorists.
It sucked.

Do you have any stories about your first time with clipless?

Shame On Ice

Looks like Lalla has got a little pet project to keep him busy during his extended work dryspell. Anyone out there need a bio-medical equipment fixer-upper? I would assume that most of you need to get your flux-compasitors fixed from time to time. Am I right? If there was anyone I would trust it would be this guy.

Another cool thing about Lalla is that I am going to be on his hockey team for the World Pond Hockey Championships out on Lake Nokomis in late January. I haven’t played any hockey with the kid, but from the sounds of it his team isn’t all that bad. My own hockey team on the other hand is kind of crappy at the moment. I write it up as a lack of chemistry between all of the players being forced to play on a new team. We also have been having a tough time of keeping out shifts short. When this happens players get tired and lazy..hence the losing scores of 15-1 and 12-1.

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I am going to the Gopher b-ball game versus Clemson. I would like to think that the Rodents have a chance in this game, but I highly doubt it with 4 consecutive non-conference losses to hapless Iowa State, Marist, Southern Illinois and Montana. The Gophers could really use the Little Guy on their team as he is a very good player. I finally convinced him to come to the Y to play some ball. He has a very good shot and some killer luck. However, I assure you that I would have whooped up on him if we played one on one…this is because I lift weights.

The University of Minnesota athletic department needs a major overhaul. It all starts with Joel Maturi. He needs to either grow some balls or get the heck out of the Bierman building. He has overseen the consistent mediocrity of Gopher Football, the demise of a Women’s Basketball program that was on top of the world and is now near the bottom of the Big Ten with the consistent loss of players under coach Pam Borden. The Men’s Basketball team was dealt a “death sentence” after Clem screwed us with the homework scandal. Monson came in and did decent, but has had plenty of time to recruit and put together a good team. Now the team sucks.

Maturi, Mason, Monson and Borden have got to go.

To solve the problems the Gophers need to hire a new Athletic Director that is a stand up guy. I suggest Colorado College Athletic Director Gregg Capell. He is a great guy that was an Associate AD under Dienhart and could turn the program around. How would he do it? By instituting graduation standards that are top notch…

*Don’t tell anyone that Gregg is in my extended family. I just want to score free tix.

Bob Williams is the wonderful director of the velodrome in Blaine. He is a wonderful guy and a walking fountain of knowledge when it comes to the sport of cycling. With out Bob’s help I would of never been able to set foot onto a track. However, recently I came across this photo. Bob, you used to race for Flanders? How could you? See if you can spot him in the photo. I will let you know which one he is at the end of this post.

(Front Row Far Right)

Friday I got picked up by Lalla. We drove and drove. We got to Iowa City and proceeded to party. I got pretty drunk and started to dance to sweet 80’s music.

I also arm wrestled Ray Ray. I destroyed her once again. Well at least I remember destroying her, but then again I do squats. I hope you didn’t forget that important piece of information.

Saturday we raced. Little Guy did well and you can read all about it on all the other blogs on cyberspace…

But, the highlight of the weekend and perhaps my important fandom was this excellent piece of events.

Chris Horner…will you sign my jersey mid-race?

Excuse me…Mr. Horner…I don’t think you heard me the first time. Will you please sign my jersey mid race?

Holy Crap. Mr. Horner you are the shit. You just signed my jersey mid-race and proceeded to win.

The best part about this sequence is that I stopped asking him for the autograph after I got the cold shoulder. I cheered for him when he came by, but I still let him know that he had enough time for an autograph. Than during the last lap right before the run-up he looked over and saw his insurmountable lead and came over to sign the jersey. I hadn’t even expected it and neither did Lalla who was mannin’ the camera.

Chris Horner is the greatest cyclist ever….he is going to win every race from now on…that is a Super-Rookie.com guarantee!

There are many more stories to tell about this weekend…check back later.

Here is just a small glimpse of the awesomness…..

Check out the sweet kit!

Chris Horner stopped during the last lap of Jingle Cross rock to take a pen and sign my skinsuit.

For all the haters out there you can’t beat that awesomeness.

I hope to have a video up soon, but there have to be pictures somewhere in cyberspace that I will find to show you all.

Since you asked….

Speed Racer: “How does Superrookie feel about Sickboy’s return to blogging?“

I’m pretty sure he couldn’t care less. He hasn’t said anything about it, and you know as well as I that he can’t keep his mouth shut.

hereNT writes, “HPE, will SR really care if I accidentally break his website while drunkenly trying to upgrade it to Wordpress 2.0? It could happen… After all, I did break my own blog, at least let it get stolen…“

SR will think the world ended, seeing that he spends 90% of his time at home on the computer, not just on his blog, but boucing around from one bike blah blah blah to the next. Nevermind that both of us would have to hear his continual whining and bitching about how he can’t blog.

As for the rest of you, you missed your chance for any dirt or juice that you could possibly want about SR, me, SR and me, and why Roscoe and I have kept him around after all these years.

I hope I kept you updated enough on Super Rookie and company’s trip to Jingle Cross so he wont feel the need to write you a novel of a race report and bike blah blah blah. Hpe signing off until the comments section.

Super Rookie had 4 beers, raced in a Velo Bella jersey (always gotta be moving in on my terrain, can’t let me have my thing) blew a tire, and got third to last place.

I told you he’d race. I want to say serves him right, but I’m not sure for what….

I got the 8:30 wake up call and the crew is off for the second day of racing. SR says due to the steep entry fee, he probably won’t race. I bet he will. I’ll let you know how everyone does.

SR has some pretty exciting news for you all, but I’ll let him tell you.

Rumor has it that SR and dis(pencer) are sharing a bed at Comfort Suites. Hey (dis), does he steal the covers and push you to the edge and blame it on the cat? Does he wake you up in the middle of the night to scratch his back?

I will refrain from any spooning or sleeping head-to-toe jokes.

You all have me until tonight. I suggest you take advantage of it. All questions will be answered before SR’s return tonight. Bring it.

Here’s how the race went, in the words of Super Rookie:

I got like top 2/3rds, well maybe bottom 2/3rds, I don’t know. But I went really fast and got some sweet air on jumps and stuff.

Karla is racing now.

So are there any xXxers there? Any drama?

No, but the guy who started it is here. He came up to me and was like “xXx sucks, I started the team.” And I was like, “I know.”*

Oh and Don Quixote lives!

*This was paraphrased from a brief interview with The Super Rookie and due to “the telephone game” things may have been misquoted. Super Rookie insists that Donny said “I was there in the beginning….” Sorry for the confusion!

Until next time folks.

Hello there Super Rookie fans and haters. Sarah here just enjoying doing the things I like to do without SR home, such as sleeping past noon, not making the bed, not watching sports on tv, being able to use the computer, and having personal dance parties in the living room.

I’ve only gotten three brief updates from SR in Iowa since last night. The first occurred at 9:44 last night. This is how the conversation went:

SR: Hey honey, we just made it to our hotel.
hpe: Great! Are you guys going to hit the town or rest up for tomorrow?
SR: I don’t know, the vegans found a co-op.

This is when I started laughing and made a joke about granola.

The second update occurred at 11:44 pm. I was sleeping and didn’t even know this call happened until I just looked at my phone, so no updates here.

The third was this morning at 9:11 am

SR: Good morning
hpe: good morning (yawn)
SR: Did I wake you up?
hpe: yes.
SR: I’m about to go pre-ride the course
hpe: Have fun, good luck, ride safe
SR: Thanks! Get up!
hpe: (snore)

So there you have it. No exciting news yet. I’ll give you the latest on the Iowa crew when I get it. What I want to know is if SR ran into any xXx riders down there and is having loyalty dilemma. I want drama!

So it’s just you and me until tomorrow night. SR asked us to play nice, but remember that nice is relative. Feel free to ask me anything and let the fun begin.