Super Rookie's World

Finally after two weeks of non-racing at the track due to inclement weather we were finally able to rock out! The events for the 1/2s were your normal circus races including a Tempo and Win ‘n’ Out before the State Championship Madison. The Tempo was stupid hard and dumb. I took 2nd on the first sprint and held on for dear life. Donimator and I had similar tactics in this race with both of us taking one point! The Win ‘n’ Out was hard from the gun with Taylor Olson taking the victory in dramatic fashion over Chris Ferris. (dis) towed me back around to get us in the group going for 4th place, but we were just little behind the ball. In the end I took 5th and (dis) took a nice 6th place.

The final event for us was the Madison and it was scary as shit. Some people might tell you that we got ‘5th’ place. They are wrong. We actually won the event, but just decided not to tell anyone! My partner once again was Tom Hagerty and we were doing great until the chaos started. Everyone made small minor positioning mistakes that added up to near crashes, but because we are all “pros” we were able to keep it up (except for Ben Dubay who decided to lie on the track self inflicted in turn one while trying to do a track stand…shocking to see a body out there trying to get on his bike when you are coming out of turn 4!). The part that I fail to understand is how riders don’t DON’T look over their shoulders before moving up track.

It is simple. There are 6 teams on the track. If you are in the lead group with one other team than that is 2 teams accounted for. Chances are that the other 4 teams are going to be coming after you at some point. Sooooooo. Look over your shoulder to make sure they are not coming. Just don’t do a quick check and move up taking two of us all the way to the rail for no reason whatsoever. It is dumb. Especially for a bush-league Madison of 6 teams.

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The other races for the night were a lot of fun to watch. A star-studded group of ladies decided to show up and give the track a whirl. Theresa Moriarty, Linda Sone and Shana Sturla came out and gave the Dahlman’s, Elena Dorr and others a run for their money in the Women events. It was rather exciting to watch some really fast road riders coming out and giving it a try. Hopefully, they will continue to come out to the boards and ‘play’ on Thursday evenings. It seemed to me like the crowd enjoyed the extra firepower.

The Men’s Category 3 raced a Kierin. Tuffy and Little Guy made it into the finals, but Franz cleaned up in a tune-up prior to Elite Nationals where he is planning on throwing down with Dan Currel and Taylor Olson. The 3 as you know did a District Record in the Team Sprint with a time that would have placed them just off the podium in 4 place last year at Elite’s! Let’s hope for a little faster time and getting on the podium this year!!! Even Goldmember would be proud of what these 3 have been able to do in their first year racing.

The Men’s Category 4/5 was a dominating performance by the 3 Grumpy’s/LGR riders. Dan Wold looked very impressive for a sprinter that has been working his ass off all year with some very respectable top 4 finishes on the night. He along with Peter Schweich and Joe Johnson cleaned up in all of the events for the 4/5s. With Joe winning the final two races on the night and Peter taking home the win in a 1/2/3 Grumpy’s finish in the first event on the night.

I was very impressed with how well they all rode on the evening. It makes me really comfortable knowing that we have 3 riders in the cat 4s that could be cat 3s at any moment. This will further replenish the ranks and will make our ultimate goal of a grassroots team realized. From day one we knew that we had talent on both the Men and Womens side of the equation and on the track we have seen great results which include Gwen Steel’s firm grip on the TROY competition and consistent efforts from Tom Hagerty, Tuffy and the Little Guy. It has been a great season.

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Tonight is the Friday Night Grind up at the velodrome. I am partnered up with Tyler Deniston. He is on great “form” and I hope to be able to help him do something out there tonight. The FNG is a take on European 6-days and there are all types of fancy events on the night. Including a Points Race, Madison Kilo and a SuperSprint. It should be a fun time and hopefully we can make this a big time event over a two/three night period in the future.

Personally, I have a love/hate relationship with the Madison. I enjoy the race and I think it is fun, but in the back of mind I am always so worried about getting caught up behind some of the ‘madness’ that is the arm-slings and inattentiveness of the riders. At times I have found myself to be the cause of the chaos. But, I need to learn to shake it off and move onto to the next 10 lap sprint. It is fun and I hope TH will still have me around next year…

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Gopher Football on Saturday. I also have an interview for a job on Saturday morning. This is because the Regional Manager guy recommended me to one of his restaurants 3 hours after meeting him and I got a call on the way to the track! What a good day.

The Cougars should win the conference title!

Check it here…

Homme and I decided to start doing a podcast. Some individuals have tested the waters with this and Homme and I will perfect it. We are trying to get it under manageable time and we expect plenty of listeners. If you want to chime in let us know!

Link here. I don’t know how to do all the fancy integrated web links/modules, but go to Nickelnuts.com and listen. We plan on doing them once a week in the 8min-10min range to keep people up to date on all the happenings.

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It has been two weeks since there has been racing at the Blaine Velodrome do to the rain. Sarah took it upon herself to remind me that there was racing tonight! Thanks honey. I didn’t even think about the Thursday night ritual…it has been that long. It is rather strange.

Some big Madison racing is coming up at the track. With the state championship tonight (with beer for sale!) and the Friday Night Grind tomorrow there are some rather large prize lists. Naturally, Bing Crosby is back and should be partnering up with Richter. This could mean another race for second place…

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I went into a restaurant and dropped off my resume and application. The lady asked me some questions told me they just hired, but they would keep my application on file. Naturally, I have heard this before and I persisted to ask her questions about possible hiring dates and highlighted some of the items on my resume. Then out of no where the regional manager who was sitting next to me in the lobby intervened and personally took my application and resume. He told me of the other openings that the company has and it sounds very promising!

Plus, who wouldn’t want to hirer me?

I have a job for 10hours a week. That means my income is roughly 1/4 of what it has been for the past year. Because of this I have started to search for new jobs. I am relatively up beat that I will be able to find something on a part time basis, but I also felt this way in Chicago a couple of years ago. Do any of you know of any serving jobs out there? I am good at serving people, just as Skibby and the entire Loon State crew. I served them on many occasions.

You have been served.

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I am in four classes this fall. When these are done in December I will have four more in the spring. I will then be a college graduate. I am also a little surprised by this. My classes this semester will be a little hard, but nothing like my experiences at the University of Minnesota. I have found courses at Metro to be a little bit ’slower’ and because of this all types of yahoos are in the program.

Everyone one of my 4 classes has an old person that likes to tell you all about their past 40years ago and blah blah blah. 40 people in the class and 1 person does about 80% of the speaking and it isn’t the teacher! Gawd help me.

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I always felt sorry for Richard Jewell. He just died. Talk about a guy that will go down as a footnote in history.

I have a real love-hate relationship with the Minnesota State Fair. This mostly has to do with the fact that I grew up about 5 blocks to the west of the Fairgrounds and for two weeks every year my neighborhood becomes the epicenter of all things automobiles. While this can be expected when you live next to the fair the idiocy of the individuals that go to the fair fail to let me down every year.

This year the fair was special. It was the first time in about 10 years that I went for the pure enjoyment of it. The last time I did that was when I was 15 and took a day off of work from my gig at the Italian Junction on Dan Patch Ave. I would like to tell you that the Junction was in fact my place of employment for approximately 4 years during high school. Because of working every day of the fair at the Junction and a few other places I have avoided the fair like the plague ever since.

Not this year. Being away from the grand shin-dig made me want to go back even more. This year I made sure to quit my job on Thursday so I could go to the fair on Friday with Sarah and her folks. It was awesome. I didn’t have as much food as I had wanted, but with the State Road Race on the following day I had to make some considerations for my health.

From my time at the fair I have always been fascinated by three things. Dudes with Ponytails, Mullets and ‘Kids on a Leash.’ Over the past few years it has become more and more difficult to find the latter. This probably has something to do with Child Safety advocates being not the biggest fans of the leashing of kids. I personally think that all kids at the fair should be leashed. Judging by the lack of ‘kid leashes’ it might be sometime before we see this law enacted.

The first thing we did was go to and get a Cinnamon Roll at the food building. I love those things, but Hotpinkevil! wasn’t the biggest fan, although this picture would imply otherwise:

Yummy.

Immediately following the Cinnamon Rolls we decided to cruise up Machinery Hill. It took about 2 minutes to see this guy:

1 down. 2 to go.

We did the Lumberjack show. It was a’ight, it was mostly geared for children. I personally could have done with out the theatrics, but watching those guys climb a giant 90ft tall log is pretty bad ass. After that we were off to the State Fair pre-fab home and we had pronto pups and cheese curds. They were both fantastic.

As we approached the Grandstand (my favorite place) we saw this lady:

You may not believe it, but the woman on the right had the sickest mullet I have ever seen. It included the ‘claw’ bangs on the front. It was quite impressive.

On to the GRANDSTAND! I love the Grandstand. It is awesome because of the dudes that try to sell their crap! There were tons of people and about 20 dudes wanting to be the next Ron Popiel. Here is a sampling:

What amazes me the most about these guys is how they always seem to get 10-15 people listening to them. This guy was busy throwing all types of shit on the tile floor for his mop thingy. I was only watching him to mock him. I swear.

Take a look at this guy:

This guy was selling a Blender and some kind of vitamin weight-loss shake. Neither of which seemed to be very good. The blender took a little to long to ‘mince’ and judging by the salesman the shake didn’t seem to work to well.

Cruising around the Grandstand can be a really tough job. That is why you might want to find your own ‘grazer’ to pull you around while you sit on her walker. Enjoy the ride!

This was hilarious. I couldn’t help, but take a picture after she hit me with her chair while I watching the ‘Salsa Shooter’ guy.

On to the DNR building so we can learn about the environment, but first I want to get some food. I know, how about we go to Deli Express and get one of the pre-packaged Chuckwagon sandwiches that we could easily buy at Holiday or Super America! That seems like a great idea.

When we finally arrived at the DNR building security was real tight. I had to distract the guards while Hotpinkevil! slipped through the door:

Whew! That was close. I will state that Smokey seemed extra ‘grabby’ this year.

Amazing. I know.

Another thing that I love about the Fair is what people decide to wear to it. On a Friday at about 1pm we saw this girl.

My guess is that she was getting ready for the big Poison concert later in the week.

With one last thing to eat (milkshakes) and with out a ‘Kid on a Leash’ we went to the Empire Commons aka The Dairy Building. This is where they carve the face of the lady out of butter. It is also the ‘minor leagues’ of the salesman of the fair. They tend to sell all kinds of shit inside this building. From special painting tape to two different types of beverage holders. Perhaps the biggest crock of shit was this sign:

We got our milkshake and made our way down towards the Midway. With the day beginning to drag and sleepiness creeping into my mind we started to migrate back towards the car. Then out of no where my day was finally complete!!!!

Read more about our trip to the fair at Hotpinkevil!

As many of you may know I have a system. A system to win the lottery. Naturally this system didn’t come cheap. I promised the gentleman that helped me ‘create’ this system 2million dollars WHEN it works. I won’t tell anyone the system, but I do in fact plan on winning the lottery at some point in my life. Yeah, you may be laughing right now, but we will see who is laughing when you are cleaning my pool. Now, on to the more important things in life.

What I am going to do when I win the lottery.

One of the first things I am going to do is buy a boat. Not just any boat like Donimator’s or Big Dave’s. I am talking about a Team Boat. A boat that is worthy of being associated with my cycling team. Not just any boat is capable of being the official transport vehicle of the Grumpy’s/LGR team. This boat needs to be able to do it all. This is because our team will not have a “bus” or a “van.” Our team will have two vehicles. 1) A yacht, and 2) This car that was previously discovered at the 2007 Durand Road Race.

I have searched high and low and have already found the team boat. Here is a picture of it:

(The Boat’s name is ‘The Little Guy’ it docks in St. Paul, MN)

This boat will become the biggest thing to ever hit the domestic amateur cycling scene. Every single race we get to will be by boat. Because we will be real rich the team name will probably change it’s name to Grumpy’s/LGR presented by Super-Rookie.com Velodrome. We will become kings of the water ways. The Gateway Cup will probably be our biggest target race at this point in time. This is because it is in the St. Louis area. If races aren’t with in 15 miles of the marina we will rent a Lincoln Town Car/Limo to take us to the races…so we will still be able to do the likes of Opus and Marty RR.

Naturally, with running such an operation we need to hire out some positions on the boat. The first position and obviously most important is the captain. We need someone with a lot of experience and knowledge of the yachting world and the terminology. For this important job I have nominated The Courteous Fellow to be the captain. Here is a photo of the CF from Super-Rookie.com file footage:

The Courteous Fellow is obviously the guy to run the show for when we are on the rough waters of the Mississippi/Ohio River/St. Croix(for Duluth races) and the Great Lakes. He will also need a couple of first mates. I think these two should be able to provide some help:

(One won’t be able to refuse the salary, and the other will just want to be able to wear pom-pom socks 24/7)

Now that we have the staff of the boat all figured out I think I am ready to sit back and relax and just watch this idea take off set-sail.

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Thinking about this boat and it’s pending dominance of the US Cycling scene has got me to thinking about the pro-racing scene. As you may or may not know one of the largest and oldest operating pro cycling teams out there is The Navigators Pro Cycling Team. They are a pretty damn good cycling team in the United States and they are even known to go over to Europe throughout the year and compete in some of the Continental races.

Did you know that ‘Navigators’ is an Insurance Company specializing in Marine Insurance? Seriously, check it out here. Kind of cool that a company like that has decided to go with Cycling to promote it’s services. Yet, how come we never see a Navigator’s Team Boat? Seems to me like every time I have seen the Navigators team around they have some kind of fancy automobile and ‘bus’ that brings them to places. Don’t you, the consumer, find that a little strange?

Is the insurance not that good? Does the team just not want to travel by boat to it’s events? How come when the team travels to Europe they fly? Seems to me that they should take a boat across the ocean…if they had any faith in their sponsor they would take a boat!

All I have to say to the Navigator’s team is this. You better hope I don’t win the lottery, because when I do I am going to steal your sponsor and at every event I am going to take a boat.

Where is the boat in this picture?

(The answer is non-existent.)

Wow.

We finally got the monkey off of our back in a big way. While the team has had great success at Time Trials and events at the Track we were still awaiting our first BIG win in a road race. We did reach the top step on the podium once before in a Masters 4/5 criterium, but we all wanted a road race win.

Going into the race on Saturday we knew we would be understaffed with the absence of the (dis). He was busy at some concert and saving himself up for the District Track Championships on the Velodrome. The team comprising of Little Guy, myself and Tuffy decided to enter the race with a few cards to play; 1) Get Little Guy into a break and 2) Get Tuffy to the end of the race in a sprint preferably with me leading him out. Our hope was to get a break off the front so we would get a free ride all the way to the end.

The first lap was rather complacent as everyone seemed to be checking out the brand new course that the Loonies put together for us. Out was the old Avon course and in was a brand new course that was originally intended to be used at the Granite Country Omnium. On this first lap near the end the LG push the pace over a little roller and was marked. I then decided to counter with a little momentum to hopefully get a couple of racers with me, namely a Birchwood rider as they had a majority of the racers. As I crossed the line the first time I sat up as the group was about 20 seconds behind me. Oh well. I tried and no one bit.

Onto the second lap and after the feed the Little Guy covers a little attack. It becomes a group of 4 up the road. We are happy with the numbers and Birchwood seems content with it so it kind of dangles. Than a couple of solo riders bridge up to it making it a group of 8. Birchwood sends another across so I tack on and catch up to the Little Guy on a false flat. Instead of just sitting on like everyone else I push the pace over it and find myself with Paul Harrison of Nature Valley/Penn Cycle. He and I quickly start working and find ourselves with a nice gap. A few miles of the two of us pushing it hard and the time gap is increasing. While this wasn’t our first plan it was a variation of it.
After a little while and on the approach to the second climb of the circuit we see CJ coming across for Birchwood. It was an awesome site as we knew that would help. Up and over and we begin to feel that we have a real shot at it. The course is perfect for breaks because of the winding nature and the fact that you can get ‘out of site-out of mind’ real fast. A few more miles into the break and Mark ‘LeRoy’ Mettler bridges over and we have 4 guys in the move. At this point I am hurting. Perhaps, the Cheese Curds from the day before are starting to hurt, or the lack of riding is taking it’s toll, but I had nothing to offer. I would pull through when I could and do my best not to disrupt the move, but I was content with the free ride.

One of these riders looks to be in pain. (Thanks to Skinnyski for photo).

Look at the pain our tiny group of 3 is causing on the pack. Whooooo Hoooooo. (Skinnyski)

Paul and CJ did most of the work and were killing themselves. Mettler seemed to be in a lot of pain and I was holding on for dear life. The break lasted for about 1 and 3/4 laps. It was fun while it lasted, but when we realized it wasn’t meant to be we for the most part we rested up to jump back in. At this point Mettler gives it one last dig hoping to produce a counter-attack. He did just that as Big Matt (Birchwood) flew past everyone and quickly found himself with a 2min gap with Mettler sitting on.

Going into the bell I thought the race was pretty much over as Big Matt seemed to play it just right, but going up to Tuffy I mentioned that he should fend for himself in the sprint as I was going to go and try to spark up a chase to bring back the break. I went to the front and did a little bit of work along with a Silver rider and as I brought the group into the base of the feed zone I popped off the back and bid adeiu to the field.

Eventually, I caught up with 3 other riders and we came across in 16-20 places and then I heard the news that Tuffy caught Big Matt on the line to take 1st place in the State at the Cat 3 level.

It was a fun race. The Little Guy and I did all we could to be aggressive and have some fun. Tuffy did what he does best and just sat in doing absolutely no work. Amazingly, he didn’t yell at anyone during the race. How about that?

Tuffy won. It was sweet! I got in a break for almost two laps…it was amazing.

We played it agressive and came away with the victory.

I am going to write an entire blog about it prior to the race so I can see if my thoughts came out roughly correct. I assure you that this blog has not been edited in any way. Matter of a fact, I am going to try and see if I can automatically make this post appear during the time when I am racing. Read this blog as if I wrote it just prior to the start of the race (although I am writing it at 5pm on Friday) We can see if I am a psychic.

Here goes:

~Holy Crap! I just saw Dewey Dickey and his sweet Volvo. I hear he is going to win the race and by the looks of it all the other riders in the area are a little afraid of Dewey. They all know that he just scored a 5th place finish at a race in Puerto Rico. My money is on him.

~Dan Swanson didn’t look so hot coming out of the kiddie toilet at the Avon Elementary School. Matter of a fact he looks like crap. I don’t know if he has what it takes today, but judging by the look of The Mean Dawg the Grandstay boys look A-Ok.

~HAHAHAHAHA! Look at all those fools paying $35 to race. I only paid $27 to race and I already have my number on.

~Hanz and Franz showed up. They are helping out a lot by sponsoring this event and lifting various things. This is because they are strong and can lift things…very easily.

~Crap. I need to get my water bottles filled. This is okay. I normally take 5 with me. Some make fun of me, but we will see who is laughing on the 4th lap.

~I heard Yorgos upgraded. He wins two races and just leaves the cat3s. Wow. I wish I could have those skills. He is good and he has braces. Making him the first ever person with braces to kick my ass, consistently (I did get beat up by Alex Hammer who had braces in 7th grade).

~Smithers is on a family trip in a small cramped station wagon. I got a ride from (unknown at this time) and can’t wait to give a ride back to Minneapolis to Seth Meyer (Get A Grip) who is racing in the cat1/2 field.
~Hey! It’s Homme! He is going to be the Director Sportif of our team next year if I win the Powerball tonight.

~Tuffy. Quit complaining! You are such a downer!

~DEWEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~Hey skibby. Why did you quit your blog? Are you mad at Grumpy’s/LGR? I heard you and (dis) made up the other day on Google Chat. Did you LOL BRB him?

~I can’t believe (dis) bailed on this race. I heard he was a “marked man” for bringing the rain to the velodrome last night.

~DEWEY!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYBODY IT IS DEEEEEEWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY!

~Mike Woell is here today. He is in the cat2 race and I predict big things from him today. Although Zimmer is looking real strong and he just told me that he is dedicating his victory to the ‘Racing Memory of Chris Doig’ who will never ride a bicycle again, because he is the proud new father of a baby girl! Way to go Doiger!

~I think that is that Noonan kid. He is nice. He promotes races and he is in college. He lives in the ‘heroin center of Minnesota’ Northfield.

~The race FINALLY just started. We have a field of about 40 guys. I am feeling real good. Mike Bantle goes on an early flyer. Big surprise. He has a 10minute gap by the 8th mile of the race.

~Hey everybody it’s the climb! Good thing I got my EPO booster shot prior to the race! I totally am killing it right now. I am feeling reallllllly good.

~2 more laps go by. Bantle has a 39min lead. We all laugh. Ha. Bantle will crack…holy crap there he is on the side of the road talking to his coach. Lalla is all pissed off.

~The motocop just took 10 guys out of the race for crossing the line. ‘OVER THE LINE’

Mark it 8 dude.

~I out sprinted Tuffy to the line. I was leading him out, but I think he miscalculated my blazing speed. Little Guy was sweeping on the sprint. We went 1-2-3 and we are all very excited.

Way to go team!

Here are some pictures of what the race is going to look like:

Here is what most of the race looked like:

(yeah. that is me leading up the climb. you will note Mike Woell somewhere in the pack behind me. This is because he asked to be downgraded~zing!)

Wow. I hope this is how it goes!

As you may know the Powerball Jackpot is at about 300million dollars. I along with the rest of the country already have a bunch of plans for spending the money. The things I plan to do with my money are the following:

~Build a new indoor velodrome. The track itself will be called “The Bob Williams Track.” The facility will be named after…wait for it…me. That is because I built it. The track will also have a few rules.

1) Private membership. I get to decide who gets to go in and ride on the track. Which would technically be called, “my track.”

2) All events at the track will be pre-registered only. This is once again because it is my track and I don’t care for people that complain about ‘pre-registration’ and last minute ‘baby plans.’

3) Next door to my track will be an indoor BMX facility. This will be free for kids 18 and under. This is because kids on BMX bikes are cool and are our future. However, if their parents are all ‘crazy’ they will be placed on probation and not allowed into my facility. What the world needs are more TC’s and Jim Cullen-esque sports fathers.

4) A world class CX facility will also be located at my bicycle center. This center will once again only be accessible by pre-registration. Which is amazing. I know. You might have to plan to go to my facility. But, I will be worth 150million so I don’t care what you think.

~Buy the team a boat.

1) More on this in a future post.

~Give some money to my folks and friends.

1) Finish school and fix up a house or something.

~Donate some money to kids.

1) This money can only be used on ‘leashes.’ Because I don’t like tripping over kids at the fair.

That is all for now!